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Dear Friend,

I have come to visit once again. I love to see you

suffer mentally, physically, spiritually and

socially. I want to make you restless so you can never relax.

I want to make you jumpy and

anxious. I want to make you agitated and irritable

so everything and everybody makes you

uncomfortable. I want you to be confused and

depressed so you can’t think clearly and

positively. I want you to hate everything and every

body, especially yourself. I want you to feel

guilty and remorseful for things you have done in t

he past, and you’ll never be able to let go of. I

want to make you angry and hateful toward the world

for the way it is and the way you are. I

want you to feel sorry for yourself and blame every

thing but me for the way things are. I want

you to be deceitful and untrustworthy, and to manipulate

and con as many people as possible. I

want to make you fearful and paranoid for no reason

at all. I want you to wake up during all

hours of the night screaming for me. You know you can’t

sleep without me. I’m even in your

dreams. I want to be the first thing you think about

every morning and the last thing you think

about before you black out. I would rather kill you

, but I’d be happy enough to put you back in

the hospital, another institution, or jail. But you

know I’ll be waiting for you when you get out. I

love to watch you go slowly insane. I love to see a

ll the physical damage that I am causing you. I

can’t help but sneer and chuckle when you shiver an

d shake, when you freeze and sweat at the

same time, when you wake up with your sheets and blankets

soaking wet. It’s amusing to watch

you ignore yourself, not eating, not sleeping, and

not even attending to your personal hygiene.

Yes, it’s amazing how much destruction I can be to

your internal organs while at the same time

working on your brain, destroying it bit by bit. I

deeply appreciate how much you are sacrificing

for me. The countless good jobs you have given up f

or me, all the friends whom you deeply

cared for you gave up for me. And what’s more, the

ones you turned yourself against because of

your inexcusable actions. I am eternally grateful,

especially for the loved ones, family and most

important people in the world that you have turned

yourself against. You threw even them

away for me. I cannot express in words the gratitude

I have for the loyalty you have for me. You

sacrificed all these beautiful things in life just

to devote yourself completely to me, but do not

despair my friend, for on me you can always depend.

After you have lost all these things, you

can still depend on me to take even more. You can depend

on me to keep you in a living hell, to

keep your mind, body and soul, for I will not be satisfied

until you are dead my friend.

Forever yours,


your addiction

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